Young Protestants usually fall into the 1-6 year old age category. The greatest conflict, however, occurs around age 3, when children begin to test where their limits are and where their options extend with respect to their parents and the environment in general.
This is the situation in which the little tantrummer responds to every stimulus with “no,” “I won\’t,” or “I don\’t want to.”
The child\’s response to the tantrum is to say, “I don\’t want to.
Or crying and screaming. For most parents, these symptoms are a nightmare. Especially when they take place in public.
You will want to be miles away from your child who is hysterically rolling and kicking around on the ground.
How do you deal with childhood defiance?
1. consider what you are going to say before responding in any way. Improperly chosen words can cause the child to
further irritate the child.
2. in any case, do not leave the child and try to be patient, at least until the worst of the aggression has passed, and then offer an alternative that the child is willing to accept. Bribery is a vicious cycle that must be avoided. It is best to make it clear to the child in advance, for example, that he or she will go home after finishing building a sand castle, or that he or she will put away his or her clothes before playing. Such set rules are a clear signal to the child that you are the one who sets the rules.
3. do not punish a child for being angry. You need to explain why you are not getting your way and that nothing can be done this way.
4. ensure that the surrounding environment (grandparents, neighbors, store customers, etc.) does not interfere with the conflict
In any case, for parents, rebellion is a time that tests nerves and patience. Nevertheless, they must always let their children know that they are loved and that they are always there for them. And if they cannot cope, they should consult a child psychotherapist who can help them solve the problem.